Feline Difficulties
by blerghy
Summary: Harry Potter crossover. The homunculi are on the move, and it is Envy’s duty to gather information on the wizarding world and their methods of creating the Philosopher’s Stone. Full summary inside.


Summary: HP crossover. The homunculi are on the move, and it is Envy's duty to gather information on the wizarding world and their methods of creating the Philosopher's Stone. He goes undercover as a cat, but quickly discovers that his ingenious disguise may have some drawbacks after all…

A/N: This is set before where the anime begins, and in the Marauders era of Harry Potter. Wrath is in the Gate, and Sloth hasn't been created yet. Edward and Alphonse are very young children, and will probably not feature in this story. It is the Marauders' seventh year in Hogwarts.

Feedback would be greatly appreciated. Any requests for pairings will be considered, though they will not be the main focus of the story. :)

Disclaimer: Unfortunately, Harry Potter and Fullmetal Alchemist don't belong to me.

Warning: This may not completely stick to canon, so forgive me if I get slightly off track. It's bound to happen at some point. :P

The Parlour

Furious, Envy moved quickly through the crowd, attempting to avoid getting trodden on. He yowled as, for the second time that morning, someone stepped on his tail. The person didn't even look down, and Envy had half a mind to change back into his usual form and run them through… but that would blow his cover. Damn Dante for making him go to England.

Master had gotten it into her head that it would be a good idea to find out about the world that Amestris had hidden itself from. She had wanted the magical world investigated, and who better to send along than the shape-shifting sin? He would be inconspicuous and able to get into the magic school, Hogwarts, without any suspicion arising. Envy was the perfect candidate for the job, but that didn't mean he was happy about it. He had taken on the form of a cat, as the school he was infiltrating only allowed owls, toads or cats, and the latter of the three was the only one that he felt was not a huge blow to his pride. He still had standards, after all.

He slunk under a table outside an ice cream parlour and watched the crowds go by, feeling very disgruntled. Humans were idiotic things, and he would have to be around them for so long. He would need to remain calm at all times. He was far smarter, older and better looking than the humans, and as such, more capable of keeping himself in check. It would be no problem at all.

His temper abruptly flared again as a group of people sat down at the table he was under, and one proceeded to kick him as they put their legs into place. Envy hissed and leapt at the offending limb, clawing his way up. Cats had feelings too, so it would hopefully seem like relatively normal behaviour. The human let out a great yell and attempted to pull Envy of its legs, but the homunculus held fast, feeling rather smug. Revenge was sweet.

Feeling another set of hands on him, Envy allowed himself to be yanked off, retracting his claws. Being a cat definitely had advantages, he decided. He glared at the person he had just wounded, and was somewhat disappointed that the human didn't glare back. The young man was too busy examining his wounded leg to notice. Envy eyed him, taking in the black hair sticking up in odd directions, and the shiny badge that read 'Head Boy' that was pinned onto his shirt.

"Are you all right, James?" a boy with light brown hair asked. Envy felt his captor's hands begin to squeeze him and he hissed, squirming uncomfortably.

"Yeah, I'll be fine. Bloody cat," James muttered. Envy could hardly believe his luck. Being kicked may have been painful, but the badge was a Hogwarts badge. If he just followed James around, he would eventually reach the school.

"Look at it!" said the person that was currently squeezing him. "Mangy cat. Probably a stray."

Envy hissed again as the person squeezed him even harder, and clawed at the hands that were restraining him.

"Oh for Merlin's sake, Sirius! Give it to me, you're hurting it," the boy with the light brown hair scolded, taking Envy into his own lap. The homunculus settled down, choosing to act tame so that hopefully one of them would keep him. That would make his job far easier.

"Here are the ice creams," another boy said, sitting down in a vacant seat and passing them out. He had small, watery blue eyes and distinctly reminded Envy of a rat.

"Thanks, Wormtail," the boy called Sirius said, accepting his happily.

"Thank you, Peter," said the one who had Envy on his lap. Envy's ears perked slightly. Was the boy's name Peter or Wormtail? Well, he would have to wait and see. Until then, the rat-like boy would just have to be referred to as 'Ratty'.

"Prongs, what happened to your leg?" the newly christened Ratty gasped. Nearly dropping his ice cream.

"That cat is what happened," the pained boy grumbled. Envy was quite confused, and glanced between all four of the boys. What was with the double names? He supposed that one had to be a codename, and the other their true name, but why would school students need them? He concluded that he would just know the boys as Ratty, James, Sirius and Brown-hair. Unless they decided to honour him with the knowledge of their _real_ names, of course.

"To be fair, you did kick it," Brown-hair said quietly, scratching Envy behind the ear. He let out a purr, deciding that it was normal cat behaviour, and it did feel sort of nice.

"No reason to rip my leg to shreds," James retorted. Envy rolled his eyes, amused by the exaggeration and somewhat exasperated.

"Hey, it just rolled its eyes at you!" Sirius said, peering intently at the sin.

"Don't be ridiculous, it's just a cat," Brown-hair huffed, stroking Envy. Envy decided that he was beginning to like being a cat. It was a brilliant disguise, as he doubted that if he had been an owl or toad he would have been accepted by Brown-hair. All he needed to do was somehow convince the boy to keep him, and hopefully he would end up at Hogwarts. Envy hid a feral grin and began to purr, rolling around of Brown-hair's lap. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all.


End file.
